Do You Do Yoga?

During the last session of my 500 hour and two years of training with Gary and AVI, we delved into meditation. I have never really had a meditation practice in all of my years of asana and pranayama (breathing practices). The closest I came were moments of inner silence brought on by the rest of my practice. I was curious what this while meditation thing was about before this training. Honestly, I had heard so much talk of meditation, but I didn’t understand what it really was.

The meditation practices were not what I thought. As with many other practices we did during the training, some people would have profound experiences leading to tears sometimes. After some meditation practices, some would talk of seeing colors or visions, etc. My experience was a little less dramatic. Gary would say, “Focus on X” - X being some word, image, etc. I would focus on X,and eventually, Gary would call our attention back. That’s it! No epiphanies, no visions, just X - how boring! I did feel still afterwards though.

Since I got home from the training, I have noticed the focus of my practice moving int he direction of meditation. All of the asana and pranayama are, traditionally, just preparation for meditation. I feel like my practice has awakened me a few times in the past month. I am normally not a morning person and am too sleepy to even try meditation in the early morning, but I have had great practices before 7:00 AM lately. I haven’t needed an alarm ay of those mornings.

I started reading “Meditation and Its Practice” by Swami Rama since I got back. His methods are rooted in the Yoga Sutras, like Gary, so it resonates with me. He teaches that meditation is about holding a mantra in your mind and letting all other thoughts cease. If I am good at anything, it is focusing on something while the rest of the world fades away (my loved ones have learned that when tying to talk to me while I am reading - I don’t ignore, I simply do not hear them). Gary initiated us into a mantra on the last day of training, and so I have been using that one. I hadn’t realized it until recently, but I had been using a mantra repeatedly in the past couple of years. It was a phrase that kept sticking in my head since the first week of the yoga training, and it means “Not me.” It seems to have helped prepare my mind for this meditation stuff.

I am not expecting dramatic visions or thoughts anymore. From what I am understanding, that’s not what it’s about. It is the ability to keep the mind focused that helps the inner self appear. Since I am good at focusing, I should stick with that for a few years and see where it takes me.